Saturday, March 21, 2015

Some the most difficult decision you've made

         

Choose a College Major

The first big decision you'll probably have to make in your young adult life is which college—or, even earlier, high school—to go to, but that might also depend on the area you're interested in studying. Overall, college rankings aren't that dependable, so the more important question might be: what do you want to major in? Explore multiple majors in your early years, consider your job prospects, and do some other detective work to make the best college major choice you can (given the information you have at the time). It might also be worth knowing the difference in income for different college majors.

Decide on a Career

 College majors and degrees often correlate with occupation, but not always (see every English major like myself who isn't doing something directly related to English literature). Degree or not, at one point or another you're going to have to decide what to do with your life. We've just started our career spotlight series so you can get an insider view of what working in different occupations is like, but more generally, here are the things you should consider when deciding which career path to go in

 Make a Career Change

 Or maybe it's time to jump ship to a different, more rewarding career. (Most people change careers more than once in their lifetime.) These are the things you should know before making the switch—not just income changes but also whether you have the skills and experience to hit the ground running. Switching careers is a huge decision, but inspiring stories of people going to medical school in their forties or otherwise realizing their calling later in life remind us that changing a career can definitely be worth it if you can focus on work you love

Go Back to School or Get an Advanced Degree

 If you're making a career change, you might want or need to go back to school. Or you might be considering grad school to advance your career. This calculator tells you if grad school is financially worth it, and these are the things you should think about if you're considering going back to school (in some cases, you can keep your job and attend classes at the same time—maybe even getting reimbursed for them—which makes the decision a whole lot easier.)

 Who to Go on a Date With

 Each individual date might not be a big deal or a big decision, but who knows if that person you ask out for the first time or say yes to dating will turn into your lifelong partner? Try to set realistic expectations when going on a first date, be careful when dating a coworker, and perhaps do some internet sleuthing to find out more about your next date. If you're curious about using online dating services, here's our FAQ on the subject.

Get Married or Not

Then there's marriage, hitching yourself up to another person for (ideally) the rest of your life. Here are some of the questions you should ask yourself before saying yes to marriage, what I wish I had known before getting married, the secrets of the happiest couples, and the mathematical formula for deciding whom to marry (basically date 38.6 percent of the people willing to date you and then choose your partner from further dates that are better than that pool of previous dates. If only marriage was that easy.)

                       

10 STEPS TO ACHIEVING SUCCESS IN LIFE

1. Set Goals: “Would you tell me, please, which way I ought to go from here?” “That depends a good deal on where you want to get to,” said the Cat. “I don’t much care where,” said Alice. “Then it doesn’t matter which way you go,” said the Cat. - dialogue between Alice and the Cheshire Cat in Lewis Carroll’s book, Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland
People who know what they want and have set a course for achieving their goals are generally happier than those that just let life happen to them. This wisdom is not new. Earl Nightingale once said, “Don't wait for something outside of yourself to make you happy in the future.” Ralph Waldo Emerson encouraged goal setting by stating that, ‘Once you make a decision, the universe conspires to make it happen.”

2. Don’t Fear Failure: “I failed my way to success.” - Thomas Edison
So often we are taught in our lives that failing is a bad thing. Failure is almost always placed at odds with success. Yet without failure few would know the way to success. No one ever did it right all the time. But most that have experienced some success have failed at some point.

3. Take Risks: “Life is either a daring adventure or nothing at all.” - Helen Keller
Life is more fun and exciting when we take risks. At the end of the day there is truth to the statement, “nothing ventured, nothing gained.” But be calculated - risk should not be taken for risk’s sake. Opportunity may knock, but it may not stand around very long. Be ready to go on an adventure at the knock of a door. A successful life includes not having regrets for not having taken enough risks.

4. Don’t Stop Learning: “Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever.” - Mahatma Gandhi
The more you know, the more you realize you do not know. Formal education just scratches the surface and is a drop of our capacity to learn. Knowledge, no matter how insignificant it may appear to be, gives us a reason to get out of bed every morning. Make it a habit to learn something new each day. Treat knowledge like a new friend. Life is so much more satisfying when we make a new friend every day.

5. Do Not Settle: “If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking. Don’t settle.” – Steve Jobs
Success is a process – not an event. Some goals may happen overnight. Others require more time, energy, and alignment of some planets. Do not get discouraged. Keep plotting forward with your plan. Evaluate your progress and make course corrections. Keep your goal top of mind and keep your feet moving. Michael Jordan once said, “If you're trying to achieve, there will be roadblocks. I've had them; everybody has had them. But obstacles don't have to stop you. If you run into a wall, don't turn around and give up. Figure out how to climb it, go through it, or work around it.”

6. Live a Balanced Life: “My point is, life is about balance. The good and the bad. The highs and the lows. The pina and the colada.” – Ellen DeGeneres
In life we are constantly be pulled in many different directions. Family, work, school, faith, community, etc. It is impossible to give attention to all things at once. There are not enough hours in a day to carve out time for each demand. However, over the intermediate- and long-term, we can achieve balance.
A balanced life should include doing a good job at work. Earning an honest pay for an honest day’s work. Balance means taking time to treat the body well and keeping it running properly with good foods, exercise, and rest. Balance means being present for the family. Few can give the family all the time it demands. But giving it “quality time” will keep the family healthy and happy. Balance means taking some time for oneself to recharge the batteries. Balance means being of service to the community and giving back. Balance means feeding the soul through religion and/or spirituality.

7. Seek a Mentor: “Tell me and I forget, teach me and I may remember, involve me and I learn.” - Benjamin Franklin
While there are advantages to failing, failure for failure’s sake is of limited use. Work towards success and deal with failure as a byproduct of a well developed plan. The best way to achieve success and limit failure is to work with someone that has already been down the same road. There is plenty that can go wrong as we travel down the road towards success. By eliminating the low hanging fruit on the tree of failure we improve the odds of success and ensure that we experience only the most worthy type of failure. And remember to thank your earliest mentors, your parents, teachers, and others, who inspired you to succeed and set you on your journey.
8. Shut Up and Listen: “I like to listen. I have learned a great deal from listening carefully. Most people never listen.” – Ernest Hemingway
Too often we spend our time doing all the talking and not doing any listening. Even when we’re listening, we’re thinking about the next thing we’re going to say. By truly listening we can fully understand what we are being told and properly engage in the conversation. If we do not listen we cannot provide what is needed. We cannot give the needed advice, solution, or shoulder to cry on.
9. Network: “I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” - Maya Angelou
No one in this world achieved success on their own. Success requires that you lean on someone for support. That’s where the network comes in. True networking means being of service to those in the network – and not expecting something in return. Then when needed, the network will find a way to return the favor.
10. Carry a Notebook: “Always carry a notebook. And I mean always. The short term memory only retains information for three minutes; unless it is committed to paper you can lose an idea for ever.” – Will Self
Our lives are busy and getting busier. Over the course of a day we’ll have ideas, solutions, and epiphanies. If we do not have a way to capture them we risk losing them forever. A notebook, whether hardcopy or electronic, helps us record our thoughts, release the mental storage, and move on to the next great idea or solution.

The art of getting what you want



              

Take No Less than 100% Responsibility for Your Life

One of the greatest myths that is pervasive in our culture today is that you are entitled to a great life and that somehow, somewhere, someone is responsible for filling our lives with continual happiness, exciting career options, nurturing family time and blissful personal relationships simply because we exist. But the real truth is that there is only one person responsible for the quality of the life you live. That person is you.
Everything about you is a result of your doing or not doing. Income. Debt. Relationships. Health. Fitness level. Attitudes and behaviors. That person who reflects back at you in the mirror is the chief conductor in your life. Say hello!
I think everyone knows this in their hearts, but the mind can play games, tricking plenty of people into thinking external factors are the source of failure, disappointment, and unhappiness. But the truth of the matter is that external factors don't determine how you live. You are in complete control of the quality of your life.
Successful people take full responsibility for the thoughts they think, the images they visualize, and the actions they take. They don't waste their time and energy blaming and complaining. They evaluate their experiences and decide if they need to change them or not. They face the uncomfortable and take risks in order to create the life they want to live.

 Be Clear Why You're Here
I believe each of us is born with a life purpose. Identifying, acknowledging and honoring this purpose is perhaps the most important action successful people take. They take the time to understand what they're here to do, and then they pursue that with passion and enthusiasm.
If you don't know what you're supposed to be doing, then just tune in to the signals around you. Looking toward others for help and guidance is helpful, but don't forget to stay tuned in to yourself—your behavior, attitude, likes and dislikes, and life experiences. Identify what's working and what isn't. If you need to, write it all down. You might be surprised by what you discover.

 Decide What You Want
It sounds so simple, but here's the problem: I see plenty of people who are overly-busy yet who feel unsatisfied and unfulfilled. They are physically tired, spiritually drained, and far from where they'd like to be—as if they've been running on a treadmill going nowhere fast. Why? Because they haven't clearly mapped out what they want and then taken the steps to get there. Rather than identifying specific goals, milestones, and dreams (and I'm talking BIG dreams and goals here), they go through the motions day in and day out tackling unimportant tasks. They end up...you guessed it...going in circles and wasting lots of energy. In the meanwhile, they grow increasingly uninspired and out of touch with their authentic selves. This, of course, sets anyone up to living a life out of balance.
One of the main reasons why most people don't get what they want is they haven't decided what they want. They haven't defined their desires in clear and compelling detail. What does success look like to you? Not everybody's definition of success is the same, nor should it be.
Don't let your inner devil's advocate (or that incessant but unimportant To Do list) inhibit you from dreaming big. As soon as you commit to a big dream and really go after it, your subconscious creative mind will come up with big ideas to make it happen. You'll start attracting the people, resources, and opportunities you need into your life to make your dream come true. Big dreams not only inspire you, but they also compel others to want to play big, too.

Believe It Is Possible
Scientists used to believe that humans responded to information flowing into the brain from the outside world. But today, they're learning that instead we respond to what the brain, based on previous experience, expects to happen next. In fact, the mind is such a powerful instrument; it can deliver literally everything you want. But you have to believe that what you want is possible.
As you commit to believing in yourself, also make a commitment to toning down the complaint department. Look at what you are complaining about. I'm fat. I'm tired. I can't get out of debt. I won't ever get a better job. I can't stand the relationship I have with my father. I'll never find a soulmate in life. Really examine your complaints. More than likely you can do something about them. They are not about other people, other things, or other events. They are about YOU.

Believe in Yourself
If you are going to be successful in creating the life of your dreams, you have to believe that you are capable of making it happen. Whether you call it self-esteem, self-confidence or self-assurance, it is a deep-seated belief that you have what it takes; the abilities, inner resources, talents and skills to create your desired results.
Have unwavering faith in yourself, for good and bad. Make the decision to believe that you create all your experiences. You will experience successes thanks to you, and you will experience pain, struggle, and strife thanks to you. Sounds a little strange, but accepting this level of responsibility is uniquely empowering. It means you can do, change, and be anything. Stumbling blocks become just that—little hills to hop over.

 Become an Inverse Paranoid
This one is straightforward: Imagine how much easier it would be to succeed in life if you were constantly expecting the world to support you and bring you opportunity. Successful people do just that.

 Unleash the Power of Goal Setting
Experts on the science of success know the brain is a goal-seeking organism. Whatever goal you give to your subconscious mind, it will work day and night to achieve. To engage you subconscious mind, a goal has to be measurable. When there aren't any criteria for measurement, it is simply something you want, a wish, a preference, or a good idea.
Sometimes we need to make just one initial goal to get started, and that's okay. At least it comes with a few actions to achieve. A first step simply can be making an immediate change in a single area in your life. Are you unhappy about something that is happening right now? Make requests that will make it more desirable to you, or take the steps to change it yourself. Making a change might be uncomfortable and overwhelming for you. It might mean you have to put in more time, money, and effort. It might mean that someone gets upset about it, or makes you feel bad about your decision. It might be difficult to change or leave a situation, but staying put is your choice so why continue to complain? You can either do something about it or not. It is your choice and you have responsibility for your choices.
Bear in mind that you have to be willing to change your behavior if you want a different outcome. You have to be willing to take the risks necessary to get what you want. If you've already taken an initial step in the right direction, now's the time to plan more steps to keep moving you forward faster.
Isn't it a great relief to know that you can make your life what you want it to be? Isn't it wonderful that your successes do not depend on someone else?
So if you need just one thing to do different today than you did yesterday, make it this: Commit to taking 100% responsibility for every aspect of your life. Decide to make changes, one step at a time. Once you start the process you'll discover it is much easier to get what you want by taking control of your thoughts, your visualizations, and your actions!